Dear you, Yes, you. How are you? Let me just make things clear before I pour my heart out here. Please know that I'm not mad. My love for you is just too much to feel any anger or hatred towards you. What I feel now, however, is pain and disappointment. When our relationship started to blossom, I was too scared to fall. But I must say, you were very persistent :) Yes, remembering how persistent you were just made me smile. You managed to make me believe that it’s okay to love again, that I can trust you, that we can be happy. And because of that, I became willing. Willing to gamble, and willing to unlock my heart for YOU to get in. There were humps and bumps at the beginning of our journey and we were both patient to clear the road.
But, for some reasons, in a blink of an eye, you decided to give up on me. You gave up on us. What’s worst was you left me on one of my darkest days. Up to this day, I still don’t understand why, but I completely respect your decision. If only you were brave enough to continue what we have despite our issues. If only distance did not stand between us. If only you can be irrational sometimes and won’t mind at all if the current situation is illogical. If only, for once, you decide based on your love for me. I know it would take a long and difficult travel to fix us. I MAY be unready for the rough road but I was very willing to continue, I was willing to fight. Unfortunately, you weren’t. I wonder, did it ever cross your mind that the supposed tough journey can be all worth it? It would’ve been amazing if we surpass all these together. Just think of how we both can smile whenever we look back to everything we’ve gone through. Sayang, we could’ve been a more mature and strong couple. You have no idea how painful it was when you said the words “leave” and “leave me alone”. In fact, those words still torture me now. I have known you to be the type of person who fights for what he wants and what is right. I guess you find ME or US, just so unworthy of a battle. No, don’t ever think that I’m blaming you for what had happen. I was just really disappointed on how you dealt with it. I just wish you tried harder. I love you so much and I pray nothing but the best for you, babe. You deserve all the happiness in the world. If given the opportunity to still get updates about you, I will be one of the happiest people to know you’ve achieved all your heart’s desire. And although I’m already starting to pick myself up, I’m all for “second” chances. Well, I have always been. My heart’s door isn’t completely close and I haven’t changed the lock yet. I’ll be waiting. I’m doing this not because I’m weak and don't know my worth, but because I truly love you and I feel that you do too. You just have a different way of coping with relationship issues. Again, I'll be waiting, I just wish that when you decide to come back, it won’t be too late. -JEN- |
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-JEN- Archives
July 2017
CategoriesThank you for dropping by :) |